BAD night

First the pump wouldn't work. I think the bag was getting clogged by the Lactinex. It normally takes 30 seconds or so to hang her feeding, prime the pump and run it. Tonight it took 15 minutes! I did every trouble shooting thing I could think of. I got it running and then I got Jax from his swing and put him in bed. About 20 minutes went by and I looked in on M only to find that the pump stopped. I was frustrated beyond any non explative word could describe!!!
So by this point an hour had gone by since I hung the bag. When I looked at the volume to see how much was left, I was shocked to see a full bag. Only 4mls were pumped before it jammed. 4!!! Only 468 to go.
It took me another 15 or 20 minutes to get her pump going again. This time I checked in on it every few minutes. It worked fine.
After about 2 hours Maryam woke up and freaked the hell out. She hadn't woken up during a bolus since May. And we haven't done a bolus while she was awake since April. She was scared out of her mind!!! I heard her start crying and yell "Mommy! My button grew something! My button broke. My button hurts! Mommy!!!" All while crying, panicing and tossing and turning and wretching.
I disconnected her immediately and started to try to comfort her. She got herself so worked up that she couldn't stop crying and wretching for hours. I laid next to her trying to help her help herself stop wretching and gagging. She just couldn't help it. I had her sitting up, I elevated her head, had her take deep breaths, and nothing stopped her. Finally after about 2 hours and lots of crying she fell asleep. Unfortunitely for me, it was only about a half hour or so before Jax woke up.
Then she woke up again. By this time it was after 3 and I was exhausted. I hasn't gone to bed yet. I had B go lay w/Martam while I nursed Jax. They fell asleep. Around 4:30ish Jax and I were still awake. He wouldn't sleep.
My usually happy morning baby was a ball of teething misery. Yesterday he coughed all day. He was also sneezing a bunch. Maybe I'm just looking for something to be wrong. I don't know.
I'm exhausted. Listening to Maryam cry all night is so depressing. She was even crying in her sleep. I just want to take all her pain away. She's been through so much in her short life. No one has fought harder than she has to get where she is today. I just hope she never gets tired of fighting.
At 5:15 she had diarrhea w/a vengeance. B cleaned her up and I cleaned up her room. After that B had to head off to work so I got Yaya. Yaya laid w/M and I continued to tend to Jax.
At 7:30 Maryam went back to sleep (after more diarrhea) in her bed alone. Hopefully she can get the rest she needs. I'm horribly worried about her.

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